Fear

1

Florian

There is nothing like working your ass off, being civil and smile, when all you want to do is hide in your room like a grumpy teenager. Not to mention that I left that phase well behind me decades ago, but sometimes it resurfaces.

The gig Boss needed me for this afternoon is a birthday party of some guy who knows a guy who knows a guy who comes here often. I have no clue who they are talking about and I’ve been here for a couple of years now.

I’ve put on my best smile all day, working hard, getting pretty good tips, but I’m sure I can’t work an evening shift too and I know that Boss probably doesn’t want me to either.

As the last men pack up their stuff to leave Boss comes up to me. “Hey, you okay?”

I nod, but I can see the doubt in his eyes. “Weird night.”

“I heard you come in this morning. Did you have a good time?” He leans against the bar as he looks me up and down.

“I don’t know.” I eye the men who walk away. “I don’t know…” I don’t want to disappoint Boss, but I need time to myself, preferably the next week.

“Lets make a deal. You rearrange the bar back to normal and I’ll give you the night off.” He hold out his hand, a small smile on his lips.

“Thanks.” I gladly take his hand and start getting to work. I can do this almost on autopilot. The men who come here every night change the layout all the time and as I go through the motions my brain wanders. It keeps going back to those last words Seth whispered to me as he let me leave the taxi ‘I’ll come see you, I promise’ and the look he gave me.

Mixed messages can only go so far, but him shutting me out after last night, that was totally unexpected. I don’t even know what exactly happened, why he did it. Okay, I have some idea of why. He will be moving on to the next town, he probably already has, and he can’t have me follow him. But he doesn’t know about what I really do, who I really am to him. He doesn’t know a damn thing.

I put the last chairs and tables back in their place as Boss calls out.

“Come here.” He beckons me over to the bar. “Here.” He holds out an envelope, today’s tips. “Now, go rest. You look exhausted and I can’t have you drop out on me even more.”

I nod, taking the envelope from him and going to the back of the bar.

A loud noise startles me, making me turn around. There, in the window of the bar, is Seth, banging on the window, pointing towards the door.

“He’s here for you, I assume?” Boss shakes his head as he goes to open the door. “Can you tell him to come ‘round back next time? That way he doesn’t need to give us a heart attack with his banging.”

I can hear Boss, but my eyes are only on Seth. The guy looks wild, his hair sticking out in all directions and he looks really wound up. “I will.” The words are spoken automatically, I somehow register what he said, but I wouldn’t be able to repeat it when asked. What I would be able to tell was what Seth was wearing, the look on his face and the words he was mouthing me through the window, ‘I’m not leaving’.